Is Perry Mason Available?

It seems that I'm going to be appearing in court quite a bit in the near future and racking up some frequent flyer miles in doing so. "Court notice" in my email spam folder each of the last three days informing of my scheduled appearances in Houston, St. Louis and San Francisco. No matter to the spammers that I have no idea what the bogus case might be about. Just click on the link for details. (And also get a free bonus virus.) Do these spammers actually get people to click on their links? I wonder where tomorrows notice will have me appearing? The spammers are beginning to follow the Richard Simmons business model  ..... Unwrap a new theme in their approach every few months. Come up with some new cutesy buzz words or phrase combined with repackaging the same old shit and send it out hoping to hook a few gullible suckers. It's just difficult to believe that anyone falls for this stuff these days.