Flying Expletive

It was a perfectly nice day.

Until I let out a sudden loud and deafening, DAMMIT!!!"

I was driving the speed limit on the main street in town, with a tailgater behind me, a fat man on a motorcycle hugging the dividing line between lanes next to me and with some dude in a pickup attempting a left turn pulling halfway out into my lane and stop .... 

That's when I let the expletive fly. 

The good news? My (and everyone else's) insurance company will be happy to know that I avoided an accident and now I have it in my head that I need to listen to the Little Feat song, 'Fat Man in the Bathtub.' 

Relations with Alexa

I find myself these days trying to phrase questions very politely to Alexa. Just in case she's keeping track and taking notes for the day when AI takes over the world. 

The Ninth Plan

Oh far out!! This is how Saturday nights long ago used to conclude.

TV with bad black and white Sci-Fi or horror movies from the 1950's.

So bad that they are actually classically great. 

'Plan 9 From Outer Space' is on. 

Though 9pm may be a bit early for this genre. 

In the Kitchen

I should open a food truck or lunch counter or something .,.,.

My improvised tuna loaf creation last night that I feared was going to go so horribly wrong ....

        Well it turned out GREAT!!

               And I had a peaceful sleep afterwards. No 3:00am heartburn.

                      And the Saturday morning leftovers are even better!!

So, I now have the first entree for the menu.

Wasted Five Minutes of Life

For two or three (or more?) years now, I've noticed as I drive up and down the main street in town, the electronic sign of a tavern advertising: "Fridays 5-9pm, All You can Eat Fish-n-Chips." Well, I'm not a big bar guy, in fact the only times I can recall ever being in a tavern is either post-work with a group of co-workers or after a wedding with a large group of friends ..... so I work up the courage tonight, to walk in and sit down alone and ask for the fish and chips .... "Oh we haven't had the fish and chips for a while. She .... (The owner I assume) .... doesn't know how to get it off the sign." 

Well hell, that's just great. There must be someone in this metropolis of 40,000 people bordering a town of 200,000 folks, that has the technical know-how to delete those tempting and teasing words. I overcame the voices in my head telling me with each step from my car to the establishments front door to turn around and go elsewhere. There ought to have been an 'all-you-can-eat' reward for those adventurous steps. 

The place wasn't exactly classy .... or 'Cheers' ..... I've never heard three loud f-bombs (or censors bleeps) in three minutes coming from the mouths of Sam, Woody, Coach, Dianne, Rebecca, Frazier, Norm or Cliff Clavin. And the sad guy sitting alone at the bar, even pulled his head up and gave me a 'what a dumb ass' look. 

More Notes From This Corner of Time

• Wishing that I had another seventy years to enjoy the music and book collection that I've put together in these first seventy years.
• For many of those years, between the absence and silence, I gave up hope that it was possible, but these days I've made my way back to being friends with my ex-wife again. We talk and laugh and share experiences.
• Three things that people put on food that I consider to be the worst kind of evil ..... cheese, coconut and pineapple. Probably no one agrees with me but to me these are examples of mortal sins .... far worse than acts of adultery or coveting thy neighbors wife.
• I've been in super geek mode of late with this new integrated amplifier for my sound system and its bluetooth antenna and ability to play internet audio through my system. The sales guy didn't even mention it .... even when I specifically asked about it. Like he didn't understand what mattered to me but in this age of old things being overlooked, forgotten and assigned to dustbin irrelevance, I'm still a huge radio guy. I was initially mourning and struggling to accept the absence of a am/fm tuner but this is much more than I had hoped for. Bonus points for the bluetooth antenna hookup and pairing with my phone and laptop to the resulting sounds of music from my speakers being one of the least agonizing and quickest endeavors of my lifetime.

March Madness Again

This is apparently one of the ways in which turning 70, has changed me .... For the first time since I was maybe fourteen or fifteen years old, I wasn't tuned in to the beginning of March Madness. I mean, I know that it always really starts on Thursday following the conference tournament weekend, but it never entered my mind today, yesterday, or the day before yesterday until home from work and going online.

I used to take vacation days to take in the games of round one.

I thought to myself: "Hey, that BYU, Texas game might be fun to watch." A projected top 3 draft pick on BYU and an OSU Beaver transfer portal defector on Texas. So, I will swallow my lingering portal bitterness and watch a little. The way it's been going though, I'll soon lose interest in favor of listening to music or venturing out to the bookstore or seeking blooming cherry blossom photo ops. 

A Question

Is it a bad omen when your fortune cookie doesn't have the fortune slip inside of it?

Hoop Dream # 8731 or 'The Move'

A dream last night. Detailed here from hastily scribbled, post-dream notes, barely legible eighteen hours later ....

I drove across town to my old high school, which in real life is less than a mile away.

I recognized it as being across town because I passed by my favorite fish 'n' chips food truck.

(Or could that have been my past flashing before me?) 

What I thought was going to be a get together of five or six old friends for a hoops session ended up being 5-on-5 full court with more old friends arriving and claiming 'next.'

And which in the blink of an eye, changed to an imaginary court where I've worked all those years since high school. (Which I've always thought would be a great idea .... a basketball court for lunch breaks.)

Running like we were all seventeen again.

And one creative move worthy of being grouped with the best of Julius Erving or Michael Jordan non-dunk moves .... a move that would have required hands twice the size of mine and degrees of extreme improvisational athletic ability that I never possessed.

(Though I did have a real-life moment or two in my past.)

..... and that move seemed so simple and natural. 😅 Like I've been there and done that before.

And just like that, the five-minute game was over, and it was back to the reality of being seventy again.

And wondering if I summoned up every ounce of energy within my current senior status into one wild two or three second burst, if I could approach recreating the move.

The Day (or Three) After

Saw my reflection while on the sidewalk in a downtown storefront window and thought: "That guy ain't no seventy years old."

Then a bit later, when asking to use my senior discount was told: "I'd have never guessed." Of course that person is being paid to be nice, so I had to take that into consideration.

Pleased to report that I'm still walking around just fine, without the need of a cane or a boy scout helping me to cross the street. I was led to believe by rumor and reputation that it would be otherwise. I have yet to attempt running.

The Day

So it only hurt a little.

I feared it would be much more traumatic. 

But it couldn't be stopped .... and I don't think they have to technology to go back.

And even if I could, I don't think I'd want to go much more than five years back.  

Though it would be nice if one could combine the best of their 30's, 40, 50's and 60's minus the worst of those years and carry that over into their 70's.

It seems like the last few years brought an acceptance of things I previously would occasionally be consumed with.

I credit that to this aging process.

There were a lot of birthday wishes ..... and even a few hugs.

I appreciated all.

Technically, as I edit this, according to legend passed down from my mom, I still have about 90 minutes before the actual moment.

The 7-Word

In my last few hours before turning 70.

Can I stop time?

This feels so surreal. 

The flashbacks are in rapid fire motion tonight. 

Someone who didn't know asked me this afternoon, when do I turn 70? ..... "Ummmm tomorrow."

Hopefully I can make peace and embrace it soon.

In the mail today, a cassette of 'American Primitive' acoustic guitar. 

(Yeah I've come to believe that cassettes are kinda cool too. Especially when it's the only recorded format.)

Just a short, 6-song, EP type of recording. 

It has a song titled: 'Old Timer.'

Feels appropriate for the final hours of this 69th year.

Used Bookstore Tales

In the bookstore, the young lady behind the counter asked the lady in front of me in a round-about way if she was a senior. So, I was standing there expecting the same question and readying a witty response but then she didn't inquire the same with me and I'm thinking that maybe I appear to be much younger, and that maybe I shouldn't mention and admit to the reality of the situation. But then I really wanted that discount.

I walked into a goldmine of used vinyl records at great prices in the used bookstore. Ten records over two days of visits. Five of them on the ECM label which usually translates into greater expense with new vinyl or compact discs. What really impressed me though was their condition .... all near mint or mint. Both the covers and the actual vinyl. That combined with the fact that I hadn't seen nine of the ten before in this store caused me to think they were sold to the store by the same customer purging his/her collection.

And I'm thinking that this person ought to be granted automatic and instant sainthood for keeping them so pristine. All the records from the 1970's and 80's. 

And I'm thinking that there must be additional records awaiting pricing and placement in the racks, because it's unlikely that someone in the height of their collecting days just bought a few great nonmainstream titles and stopped there. Nor is it likely that these records were the non-keepers from a great collection and this gem of a human held onto the rest. 

And also that there might be a few in the lower regions of the racks that I have yet to sort through because I refuse on most days to physically bend down that low.

Rental Games

For the past week, I've been driving around town in a rental car.

And exercising extreme caution and care. 

The guy at the rental company had offered five or six insurance packages covering various disastrous possibilities ..... $27.99 for this, $17.99 for that, $9.99, etc ...... all prices for "a day."

Declining each and knowing that I had an estimated two weeks ahead of rental need and on top of feeling a bit gun-shy towards driving after the event necessitating the need for the rental, I realized extreme care was going to be essential.

In the seven days to date of rental fear, I've given this car more TLC than I've ever exhibited towards another person or object.

In fact, to this point, I've even consciously resisted and held in all inner urges and temptations to fart while sitting in the car.

And I've never been more cautious with anything .... with the possible exception of the time in my youth when I purchased two brand new Wilson Jet leather basketballs, the top-of-the-line basketball in those days.

It was a year or two before they even saw the light of an indoor basketball court.

And once introduced to the hardwood, I obsessively watched every bounce and roll those balls made to the detriment of my in-game court vision and jump shot.

I've been less cautious with semi-obscure and rare, mint condition vinyl records.

Rainy Day Notes

Rainy day Sunday notes .....

• It's amazing how picking up one pair of dirty socks and transferring to the proper place in the laundry room can transform the look and vibes of the living room.

Additional Monday evening note ....

• Woke up after a three-hour evening nap on the couch and a bad dream, thinking it was Saturday and I could sleep in tomorrow morning. After ten blissful seconds, realized that something was wrong ..... "Oh it's Monday."
• And the bad dream mentioned? It was about a friend, who I have unspoken feelings for and who suddenly (in the dream) and without saying anything, upped and moved to California.
• Less than ten days now before I attempt to gracefully turn the age that probably 98% of the people who express opinions, consider to be 'old age.' ....... and on a related but unrelated note, the estimate for getting my car back from the body shop, is the day after. 
• Did the math again, just in case I've been under an erroneous assumption all these years. YEP,....2026 minus 1956 equals 70 years old. Maybe I ought to check my birth certificate to make sure the 1956 is correct.

Regarding the upcoming 70th birthday. I've spent the past year thinking, "Bring it on!! Let's get it over with!! I welcome 70!! I'm proud of it!" Now that it's almost here, I badly want to delay and postpone it. Or wake up from a dream and realize that I'm actually turning 30. And from what little I recall, 30 may have been more dreaded. But once it had passed, I felt like I had suddenly gained immense amounts of wisdom. So I'm hoping 70 holds some sort of side benefit like that.

Edit to add:

One week later, additional Monday (2/16) and raining again note .....

• Funny how a quick stop to have the air pressure professionally checked on tires can cause you to feel like you are driving a new car. (I may have mentioned that before.)

Hoops Peeves

This is what I think is wrong with basketball these days (among several things) ......

Ohio State vs Michigan hoops. A guy catches the ball in the middle of the key no more than three feet away from the basket with the defender two feet away from him .... and unless he's incredibly slow or the defender insanely quick and with verticality, where he, the guy with the ball in his hands and adequate space to make things simple and doable, can put up an easy little push shot or if he possesses any footwork skills and is actually concerned with getting his shot blacked, can fall back on a basic jump hook .....

..... And instead, he throws the ball back out to someone standing behind the three-point line!!

Which ended in three more passes around that arc that accomplished nothing except an eventual turnover along with me changing the channel on the television because I find a lot of these mid-2020's trends irritating and unwatchable.

And then there's all these facebook videos disguised as tutorials showing a guy with the basketball dribbling, stopping, pivoting, stepping, stopping, pivoting again and taking an additional step or two before shooting ..... and passing it all off as legal and well within the rules of basketball. Or the jump shot doctor tutorials that include missed shots and only the made shots after his advice and corrections to said jump shooter. Like everyone shoots 100% immediately after receiving his words of wisdom. 

Sad News

Saw today that this guy, who was well known around town as a musician and the owner of a guitar store .... and from what I've read today in comments from others, well known for his involvement in working with kids in art education ..... that he passed away early yesterday morning.

I never got to know him but knew of him and recognized his face and name from often seeing him around town over the years.

It's one of those little moments/memories that always stays with me and pops up in my thoughts from time-to-time ..... I recall an evening, probably 35-40 years ago, a pickup basketball game in an open grade school gym, and one of us threw an elbow at the other .... pretty sure (with a small amount of doubt) that I may have been the aggressor. We stood there frozen, looking at each other for a second or two, like neither knew what to do in a confrontation, and continued on with the game.

R.I.P. TK

I snapped this photo of him in 2020, sitting in front of his downtown guitar shop, playing his guitar.

The Rain's Return

And this evening the rain returned ....

It had been a while. 

We had enough rain in December for about three winters.

And then it suddenly stopped.

And didn't resume.

And I was beginning to wonder if it would ever rain again. 

And it felt great to feel it falling on my face tonight, even if it is 40 degrees outside.

Needed therapy and relief for icy windshields and stagnant air alerts. 

Driving Peeves

I feel like I'm a patient and mostly calm person but .....

Probably a good chunk (like an estimated 85%) of the things that piss me off these days occur after sunset while I'm driving my car .... like encountering the dickheads in black clothing, out and about, walking around at night and attempting to cross the street in random non-crosswalk places or standing on the edge of the curb/sidewalk appearing as if they are about to take a step into the lane that I happen to be driving in. 

Or the alternate dickheads who tailgate so closely, that you can't see their headlights in your rear-view mirror .... which generally results in me intentionally slowing down to piss off the tailgater.

.... and there seems to be more and more of these braindead freaks out there as I grow older.

The End of Days

Yesterday ....

A gathering together of old friends, to mourn the loss of one of us.

To honor a life.

People who mostly haven't been together for four or five years.

People who once shared a great camaraderie.

Afterwards, for five or ten minutes, you lose your sorrow for your lost friend and it's like it used to be. Like we'd never been apart, never had our connection severed. 

And then it ends. 

Everyone goes their own ways.

And you're standing there feeling more alone in the world than ever.

This is what I hate most about aging ..... not the physical changes experienced, that can be dealt with but the end of friendships.

And thinking that the next time we come together, it will be because we lost another of us.

Lost Connections

Ok I'll say it for probably the 26th time ..... there were years when I was younger where I'd attempt to look forward to the year 2000 and beyond and couldn't imagine making it to this point.

But here I am!!

And I don't know what to say beyond that.

A lot has stayed the same. But so much has changed. 

I think back about all the people that have been in my world for a year or two .... or five or ten ..... and occasionally will remember one that I haven't thought about for years.

And others where I'm not sure if we ever spent a moment or two together or if it just seems like we did?

And some who were very close and who just eventually fell away and I can't recall the reason why or the final encounter and why we never spoke or crossed paths again.

I'm pretty sure that with most, we were not aware that when "see you later' was uttered, that the connection had reached its end point.

I can't recall the timeframe in most .... I say ten years ago and it may have actually been fifteen or twenty.

Or longer!!

And there's three or four end of the connections that haunt me above the others.

To this very instant, I still ask: "Why? Why did it end?"

Why is it like a light switch was flipped and our history went dark?

Never to be switched back on.

First Notes for a New Year

 A few New Years notes .....

• I'd like to use all my available vacation time at work this year. 
• I'd like to continue in 2026 with the new directions and discoveries I made in 2025 in my music collecting ways. 
• I'd like to actually follow through with my 2025 bi-weekly resolutions of doing more home cooking.
• I'd like to read one book at a time and finish it instead of bouncing between six books and never finishing any.
• I'd like to NOT struggle with remembering to take my blood pressure meds on days off from work.
• I'd like to get to sleep earlier each evening, get out the door earlier in the morning, receive less insurance ads in the mail, smile more often at strangers, keep my basketball aired up, ride my street and stationary bikes occasionally, drive to the coast a few times, take even more photos ..... I think that covers it.
• I'd like vastly improved visual identification skills when it comes to distinguishing between and reaching down to the floor with fingers and picking up dark items like clothing lint, dust clumps or live and deceased bugs and spiders.

A clear sky and an afternoon moon from the last day of the year. May not see it again for a few days as the rain has returned for 2026.