Changes and Transitions

For most of my adult life, I thought the biggest transition a person experiences was the transition from high school to whatever direction an individual might choose. 

Now I'm beginning to think it's the change from feeling you are young and hip and part of the crowd to the realization that you are suddenly none of those things.

I reached that point a year or two ago. 

And it hasn't been a graceful transition.

I silently mourn daily the intangible things that I feel have been lost.

Nowadays, I'm well aware that I'm part of a different demographic.

Or that there's something separating me from most others.

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I ride my exercise bike with a distance goal in mind.

Once I reach that goal, in my mind I'm exhorting myself: 

           "One more hundredth ..... One more hundredth ..... one more tenth ..... one more."

The loudest that absolute silence gets.

And before I know it, I've doubled my goal.

Small steps. Just keep going!! Keep showing up.

Adds up quickly. 

My mantra these days.

Rant On Old Dude

My rant of the day .....

I get bigtime irritated at watching all these so-called basketball instructional video shorts on facebook, instagram and youtube.

Have the rules on traveling and pivot feet changed drastically since my day? 

You can now take three or four steps without a dribble and change your pivot foot a time or two?

Are there people out there really teaching this shit or are they just trying to intentionally piss off us old-schoolers?

Are these the Euro rules? 

Reason to Believe

I might be delusional, but I think I'm becoming less gray.

I don't look in the mirror much anymore, but I have formed that opinion. 

Is that a possibility at this point? For a person as far into their 60's as one can go?

Is this a real thing? Could I be reverting back to my youth?

Maybe I'll be playing basketball again.

Maybe I'll feel comfortable driving at night again.

Maybe I'll weigh-in at 180 pounds again.

Like the song says, maybe there will be "a reason to believe" again.

Quick Hitter

Wow!! That was something different.

Short, quick and intense storm just blew through.

Dark sky rolling in, heavy rain, strong winds howling, thunder rumbling (in stereo surround sound it seemed.).

Big trees swaying. Tree limbs snapping. Power went out for a few seconds. .....

     ..... rapid fire, off, on, off, on!!

The mayhem, five to ten minutes in length. 

And just as suddenly, it's over and heading east and elsewhere.

It certainly made known its arrival and passing.

Then the rain stopped, winds greatly lessened, and the sun emerged from its seeming oblivion.

Almost springlike even.

And it's like the storm, and previous ten minutes, never happened.

2/25/25 edit .....

I read that there was a tornado warning issued for just across town, five-ten miles away. A co-worker showed some video of a lightning strike just a door or two down from his house. Maybe not so unusual for many but weird, wild stuff for these parts.

Eavesdropping

I'm always attentive to a little good-natured, age-related trash talking.

Must be a carryover from my basketball playing years .....

A couple guys at work, five to ten years younger than me, who are both into trains, watching a freight train passing by in the distance:

"When I was young, we used to jump the trains and ride them."

A third, twenty or thirty-something guy:

"You mean you used to jump on your horses and rob them?" 

Me in the adjacent room: 😂🤣🤣

Day Is Done

And just like that it's over.

And I don't hope to have another birthday, for at least five years.

Next up .... Jury duty next Monday. 

Am I not too old to competently judge people's guilt or innocence. 😁

Happy Birthday ..... Maybe

Trying to fully appreciate the final hours of being 68. 

Though I know it's mathematically impossible, except for leap years, it feels like the time between birthdays grows a little shorter each year.

Not by a day or two but measured by months.

Why does everything else slow down with the senior years except the time between birthdays?

A co-worker sent an email asking if I was going to be present on Wednesday.

My boss messaged me asking what my favorite candy is, so I guess I know what to expect tomorrow.

I was hoping there would be a vinyl record shopping spree involved.

Looking Forward

Last night's fortune cookie:

          "Keep your eyes open on Thursday for a special opportunity."

Hmmmm, Well it's the day after my birthday. What could it be? Is there a 10% after birthday bonus added to the current senior discount at my local vinyl record shop? Or free sub sandwich day at the Sub Shop?  Or a cool $1 million dropped into my savings account but only if I ask, day?

The possibilities are endless. 

I'll keep my eyes open but I'm thinking it will be more along the lines of paper cups being available by the water cooler at work or no waiting to get to use the restroom. Both of those qualify as special. I mean, I thought it pretty special the day I walked into Jimmy John's near closing, and they were giving away free unused stale bread. I considered that opportunistic timing.

Vinyl Nightmare

A true nightmare.

About entering a record store with a stack of vinyl records looking for whatever they would offer.

An experience I've yet to know and hopefully never will.

A dizzying scene as there were multiple people around the counter ..... where I left my wallet and a wad of cash.

And regrets about one of the records that someone else immediately snatched up and took home .....

..... A Stephen Stills record with Allman Brothers cover art.

And a feeling of puzzlement when the dude behind the counter wasn't interested in three records from the stack and only offered $10 for the rest.

But maybe that's the norm?

Then awake and the thought: "Oh shit, I'm late for work."

Which was also the best part of the dream as it's a day off today.

Saturday Notes

A rare Saturday these days where I'm off from work.

Went out for breakfast at the grocery store grill.

While there ordering and waiting, there sure was a lot of aging geezers coming and going and dealing with the new-fangled technology of the ordering station/island.

Something like 75% of the faces seen. Was it half-price for male geezers day?

And before I'm accused of ageism by any possible new readers ..... I qualify as one of those geezers. 

I skip breakfast on most workdays, preferring to sleep to the latest possible second so taking myself to breakfast is always a treat.

Had my usual reaction to crossing the river ......

     Great! With my luck this is when the big earthquake will hit, when I'm halfway across this bridge.

Drove the short distance to the fields where I spent so many hours in my working youth soccer days.

Drove about as slow as possible while circling the area, letting the memories, visions and emotions wash over me.

These fields have begun to feel like sacred ground to me.

I rarely look in the mirror any longer .....

     I've become afraid of what might be looking back.

I'm constantly looking at sites that advertise old vintage stereo gear online,

     Receivers, turntables, speakers, cassette decks and reel to reel players, etc.

Especially from the golden age of stereo gear ..... the 1970's and early 1980's.

All those non-digital lit-up displays, knobs and dials turn me on.

And whatever I'm looking at in a given moment is always the coolest thing I've seen.

(Most likely to be continued as the day progresses.)