Watch Collecting Blues

Well apparently it doesn't just happen with music .....

Bought a new watch yesterday. The moment I walked away from the purchase, the dred feeling overcame me that I already had that same watch at home. It only grew stronger as I went about my afternoon rounds. Upon arriving home a few hours later, I practically ran inside to check things out. I felt an initial slight sense of relief upon comparison as the faces of the two watches appeared to be different dark shades. Then suddenly: "OH SHIT!!!" It was just the light that each piece was being viewed inthat was causing the slightly different look. It's the same watch!!

Why couldn't I have a moment of hesitation and thought before making the purchase? Now I have to return to the store with my tail between my legs and attempt not to look too out of touch as I ask for my money back.

Moving Beyond Dreams 101

The dreams just get stranger and often with no link to anything that's ever crossed my mind. Does this happen to everyone as they grow older? What brings out these imaginary plotlines and situations? Usually involving some sort of personal dilemna where I wake up relieved to be jolted from this make believe dream world. Nothing too frightening that I can recall just weird with aspects that make no sense .... Like I'll be at home then a moment later, I'm in New York City. It all leaves me a little curious and even looking forward to discover what will be generated next.

Shock

Shocked and a little saddened to read of the passing of someone I didn't know. A person I wasn't actual friends with. A television personality who made a connection of sorts through humor and beauty and who silently vanished from sight over a year ago. Today I read of her passing away just a few days ago. Kinda funny (as in strange), this feeling of loss for someone thousands of miles away and who I had no real physical connection to. I had no idea of what she was going through. Reading about it is frightening. Wondering what the final year for her was like?

Maybe the worst way to go. Aware of your condition and wishing you could slow down the progression but gradually and relatively quickly fading away.

Some people just appear so full of life and passion and appear as if they could go on forever and when that life suddenly ends it's a little difficult to comprehend. Like the news must be mistaken.

Part of it all is the realization that I'm at an age where I accept that nothing is certain and where I occasionally wonder if I'll still be around a year from now.

Continued From Yesterday

..... And today I exchanged hello's with the new next door neighbor. Seems awful young. Hopefully it doesn't translate to rowdy. I treasure the peace and quiet that I discovered in this place. And the respect for one's surroundings. Something you don't find everywhere. I know from experience.


MY CHUCKLE OF THE DAY ...... A guy in the grocery store in the self checkout line purchasing beer. The system apparently halting the process, wanting him to display his ID to the attendant. He was obviously in his 50's or 60's. As he flashed his proof of age documentation he said: "I just turned twenty-one."  ..... Maybe you had to be there. Part of the humor was in his tone when he delivered the line.

A Change In The Status Quo

It appears as if I have new next door neighbors. Though I never took notice of the previous residents moving out. How observant of me. No mention of the impending move in a conversation a week earlier about new cars. My first clue .... A quick glance in that direction and the absence of prior porch furnishings and decorations.

The previous occupant? ..... Quiet and respectful. I took unmeasurable comfort in that knowledge and stability. With the new neighbor(s)? ..... Who knows.

With the unknown there's potential for problems. I heard childrens voices yesterday resonating from that vicinity as the snow fell. I suppose those kids could be from anywhere but I fear they are next door. Not the situation I would hope for. Sorry that my advanced age and state of grouchiness are now showing but I don't want to come home to or peek out from behind closed curtains and find marauding, wild children in my driveway, drawing with chalk or kicking random #4 soccer balls up against my car or my windows and doors.

No offense intended towards anyone's children. I enjoy their voices at play as well as anyone ..... As long as it's from a quarter mile or greater distance away.

I think I should have been consulted with and given final say on this matter!!

Notes and Confessions

• I don't see myself as a prude yet I get easily disgusted by people who dress sleezily and then go out and walk around in public. I mean you don't really need to show off your rolls of fat like it's something to be proud of.
• It's probably pretty strange but I have this small number of movies that I like to fall asleep to each night. Maybe six or seven movies on the playlist. I'll play and replay a specific film five to ten consecutive evenings then move on to the next, eventually repeating the cycle of movies. Mostly just listening to the dialogue as I drift off to sleep. I enjoy other movies as well but when it's time to settle down into sleep mode, it's just this small list that I return to each evening. War movies ..... The Desert Rats with Richard Burton, Objective Burma with Errol Flynn, Back To Bataan with John Wayne, Pork Chop Hill with Gregory Peck. A few others. Just a quirk of mine. Something about these movies puts me at ease. 
• There was a period in my life where I fell asleep each night while listening to late evening talk radio. Another period where it was football or basketball games that I had recorded to tape or disc. A month or two long ago where I had to hear Art Garfunkel's, Watermark album as a sleep aide. I've never been a need total darkness and quiet in the house, type of sleeper. I prefer a little light and a little background noise to take my mind off the daily grind and worries. 
• As wierd as all that is, it's what I've felt comfortable with over the years. As a possible consequence, I've never had an issue with falling to sleep. 
• I hate that moment when driving a new car transitions from feeling like something exciting and new to just being part of the routine. I mourn as the odometer passes the hundred, then five hundred mile point, wishing that I could keep it feeling new forever. Balance that with the fact that for that first hundred miles or so, I had trouble accepting that the car was really mine. I paid for it in cash, owed nothing and yet felt a certain uneasiness. Like it was only a rental or something. Then I worried that actually driving it around town was akin to showing off. Like I was trying to draw attention to myself when in reality I was trying to keep it quiet from co-workers and anyone else that I had something shiny and new. 
• You go to work every day and try to do your best and maybe you deserve an occasional reward or feeling of recognition and accomplishment. Even if you're the one providing such (new car). So I don't know why I have to experience these accompaning moments of doubt? But that's me I guess. That's the way my mind works.