Correcting False Information ..... AKA Potential Rant of the Day

Was taken aback a little, errrrrrr a lot, by a friends posting on Facebook of a John Hiatt video for his song "Have a Little Faith In Me" and then making the comment that "He isn't very popular." And someone else replying, "Who?" I mean, that kind of language just gets me all riled up.

WRONG!!! I wanted to say. He's actually well known among those who know good music. But I figured that would offend plenty of people. Like I'm insinuating that most people don't know really good music .... which I actually do believe is true. But I don't want to start an argument so I refrained and instead said that he's well known among those into Singer/Songwriters and has about a dozen great albums. I figured that was PC enough. And hopefully I provided a little music education.

If John Hiatt is not well known it's because too many people settle for mediocrity in their music choices and don't search for quality. They blindly accept what their television tells them is good.

OK, I'm feeling better now.

Consider The Foot

You ever stop for a moment and look at your feet and wonder just how they do it? The constant running, walking, jumping, stop-and-go, etc...? Study the foot. All muscle and veins. Not an ounce of fat. Yet it looks so frail and tightly wound. It looks at all times like it's ready to snap and break. It takes more abuse than any other body part and keeps coming back for more. You'd think there would be a breaking point. And it's so difficult to find the perfect pair of shoes to pamper and care for those feet.

Merging For Fun and Pleasure

A story on the news today ..... I don't understand why some random YAHOO running amok would get irate to the point where they would point a gun at another driver simply for not signaling when merging onto the freeway. It's not like the merging driver has any other options available. If a car is in the on-ramp, then it's going to merge. It's not like you're getting caught by surprise. So why get upset at something that is going to happen, signal or no signal?

There's way too many nutjobs out there getting set off by the slightest occurances!!

Sunday Notes

• A day off from work. A trip to an art gallery in Silverton. A couple purchases which led to a little re-arranging of things at home and it suddenly feels like a total makeover. 
• The single day off from work sometimes feels like a cruel joke. It goes by so quickly. 
• I want to buy a new car sometime soon. Been checking out several models. It will possibly be my last new car purchase so I want to be very selective. Just for once, I want to feel like a king.
• More and more, I am having a difficult time enjoying anything about work. Is this when people know that it's time to start thinking about retirement? 
• Watched the 1959 movie, The World, The Flesh and The Devil. about three survivors of a nuclear holocaust. I'd never heard of it before yesterday. So many great movies from the 1950's. In my opinion, the greatest decade for movies. 

Free Falling (Apologies to Tom Petty)

You're descending a ladder when your attention is suddenly drawn elsewhere by an unexpected sound. In that instant you forget where you are at. You think you are on the bottom rung and your foot taking the next step is searching for the assumed solid ground. You release your grip on the side of the ladder while the foot still seeks the surface it knows is there. But your other foot is still actually on the second rung.

It's a strange sensation ..... that instant where you realize you are falling. Helpless. Like you are watching it all take place in slow-motion from ten feet away. Your foot finds the ground but it's too late to regain control. Somehow, like a cat, you've managed to go from falling backwards to landing on your hands and knees. The sudden impact with concrete shakes and rattles your world. (And tears a hole in the knee of your jeans.) You wonder for an instant if you can get up. You're sixty afterall. Are you not supposed to be in that stage of life where: "I've fallen and can't get up."? Apparently not yet it seems.

You're on all fours for several extended seconds it seems, waiting to see if the pain from a broken bone arrives. Reminded of the teenage years and playing football with friends. Hearing a loud snap as the play ended in a tackle. Knowing that someone had just broken a bone but who? It seemed like an eternity before the screaming ensued. Return to the present and all seems to be OK, spare a little (or much) embarrasment and a few scapes and bruises. All prior efforts at putting forth an image of dignity and grace have just been shot to hell. Officially a klutz now.

You're in the first aid room and it's asked if there were any witnesses. "I don't know. No one came rushing over" to help you up. Either there were no witnesses or no one cares. Gotta be one of those choices. Hours later, you're asked just how you managed to get up from the ground (like the person asking also thinks you're in that fallen and can't get up stage of life.) "Ummmmmm well I just got up." You might be old and grouchy and grizzled and gray but you can still take a fall.

Simplifying My World

Finally overcame my massive fears and took the plunge into online banking. The deciding factor may have been the paperless statement option. I had grown weary of these twelve page monthly statements that I'd end up cutting into tiny pieces. Small enough that it would require the universe's alltime jigsaw puzzle master to re-assemble. This on the heels of the life changing decision of direct deposit of my paycheck.

I've decided to stop worrying that my use of such technology would possibly hasten the arrival of the end times. I've decided that online banking is safer than trusting my mailman to be 100% accurate when delivering bank statements to my mailbox. And I was growing increasingly weary of trips to the bank or ATM. I'd have plans formulated to do this and that and this and as I was walking out the door these great plans always seemed to gain the late addition of: "Oh shit, I have to stop at the bank first. Damn, now I don't want to leave home!"

And all this on the heels of getting rid of my home phone and all the scam phone calls that never end ..... and by-the-way, you owe us $75 a month for us letting all these scam calls get through our high tech wires to your home.

I'm discovering that the older one gets, the less bullshit-like details and hassles they are willing to have in their life.

Art Mania!!!

Salem Art Fair happening this weekend and later today I hope to find something that I NEED to bring home. I walk around the setting in the park and want one of everything. If only I were a professional basketball player just having signed a free agent contract the past few weeks. Incredible money going to players who haven't done all that much in their career to this point.

But I digress. I never cared much for the artsy-fartsy scene until six years ago. Thankful now that I was open to changes in my lifestyle. These days I like to think of myself as a collector. A question that stumped me upon being asked as I was purchasing my first painting. I couldn't see on that day what would develop. My style? ..... Modern Eclectic Eccentric Wierdo maybe? Leaning towards the works of local artists. I love looking around my place and thinking: "This is Oregon. This is the Northwest!" I know nothing about what I'm collecting. Just working off emotions and reactions to what I see. What moves my inner freak.

I do have a thing for the abstract image with some sort of recognizable human figure dealing with confusion or dilemma.

Thus I venture forth with eyes wide open ....

20-Something White Trash

Even with all the problems that go with being sixty, so happy today to be well clear of that 20-something, white trash stage of life where the ATM won't accept your check and after repeated failed attempts to deposit, you resort to yelling at your slacker boyfriend who's sitting in the car, about his money always being so wrinkled up. They're probably still driving around town searching for someplace that will cash that crumpled check. A bunch of agony that I think I've finally earned the right to avoid.

In Your Eyes

Heard some not-so-good news a few days ago regarding a co-workers marital status. Suddenly I can clearly see things in the persons eyes that I was oblivious to before. Fears, chills, betrayal and lonliness. A person that previously I would joke easily with 99% of the time ..... Now I'm watching every word that I utter, not wanting to worsen things. Remembing what I went through many years ago. Where normally I would light heartedly joke about the persons spouse, now I won't speak the name. Knowing that a person going through this hell, most likely wants to keep the details private from all but possibly their closest confidant. Where I was blind to it just a few days ago I can now see it all in the facial expressions. It's funny what just a tiny bit of knowledge can do for one's perception. It might be my immagination but while I swore that I would not spread what I was told to anyone else, it's like I can suddenly sense a number of people around me talking about it.

My co-worker stopped me this evening and wanted to show me dozens of photos on her cell phone. Of herself, her mother and children. I couldn't help but notice that in none of these pictures was the face of her spouse. I stayed far away from mentioning his name. Knowing that she is probably attempting to cover her hurt.

The Cola Challenge

I kicked Pepsi and Coke cold turkey three or four months ago. Yet some people are having difficulties with believing that. They offer me a bottle, I politely decline and feelings get hurt. Like I'm insulting them by turning away an act of kindness. I try to explain that I was experiencing certain difficulties, brainstormed possible reasons why and am making changes in long established routines in an attempt to feel normal again. Some people buy my explanation, others apparently assume that I don't have the willpower to follow through. But it's been awhile now and I'm feeling no urges to weaken my resolve.

Starting Over

I wonder if we could start the world all over again, would we do better the second try?

Alternate musing ...... If I could reset my life and change just one event, like taking college more seriously. Or staying married or having a child, how different would it have turned out?

I hope one day to be like William Stafford. To wake up early each morning (even though I currently don't enjoy waking up early) and write a poem. Or to note each day with a photograph.

These Days

Reached the point where so many of my old favorites are no longer releasing new music like they used to and I simply don't know much about the younger bands and musicians. I see all these records with their artwork but I have no idea what lies within.

And then when I find someone that I have interest in, I get into the record store and can't remember their name. I'm not sure if that's a getting older thing on my part or a lack of previous exposure and history? Did I easily recall Neil Young's name forty-five years ago after hearing his After The Goldrush album for the first time?

And radio doesn't assist in the discovery and information process like it once did. Most stations now are news and talk show formats and play little music. And then the stations that play music, mostly play country or Classic Rock. It's primarily becoming a process of randomly stumbling onto new sounds and hoping that they can produce a substantial body of work and become someone worth seeking out.