One of These Days

Been working on one very personal piece .... an 'attempt' at poetry ..... I call all of my pieces, 'attempts' and of course, all are very personal to me, but this one, even more so in my thoughts. I've been working on it for months now and I don't know how I will recognize when it's finished. Hopefully, one of these days.

Every time I begin to wonder if it's near the end, an inner voice tells me that there's more to be remembered, more to be expressed.

I went three weeks and only added a single adjective. It felt like the word made a difference.

And I don't know if I can ever share it. It's that personal to me. But it feels like it has to be said. If for no other benefit other than ensuring that I don't forget. So that it doesn't lose significance in my mind, five years from now. 

New Day

I have fallen into this rut of laziness at work and home and with little else happening before and after. I can find plenty of things to blame but it's really all on me. At least I recognize it. It's resulted in my becoming uninspired with grooming and my wardrobe. 

It's like I had given up and accepted aging. I felt like I was looking lately as if I had just come down from the mountain after years of seclusion. 

So, I put the chosen attachment on the clippers and trimmed my remaining hair and thickening facial hair. 

Wow! I suddenly feel like a real live person again. And I've vowed to spend some money on clothing. 

It's a version of me that I feel much better about. 

This Father's Day

'This Father's Day,' it's a Peter Himmelman song. Give it a listen. 

A co-worker asked this morning if I had a nice Father's Day?

"Well, Yes, I suppose. Though I'm not a father."

"That doesn't matter, you still deserve the day."

What an incredibly nice thing to say at this point in my life. I smiled and thanked him and then thought about that for a bit and he's right. For all these years, I do deserve some sort of recognition. I like to think that I would have been a good father. 

Freer Than Free

This is when I feel the freest these days. The late afternoon and evening before a day off from work. No issues with the clock, staying up late, playing a few records, listening to the rain, quietly appreciating life and everything around me. Attempting to be aware of and savor every sound, each visual, every single hour.