Weekend Notes or Having No Life

Ever been so tired and hurting physically that every thought about going somewhere and doing something, quickly gets shouted down by the inner voices? Even the ritualistic trip to the record store!! So tired that even while at home, the notion of putting a record on the turntable seems like it requires too much effort? That's what this summer cold has caused. So much for my fanatical hand washing efforts of the past year. I promise though to get out of this rut once I begin to feel a little better.

So I've been watching the classic movie channels. A few that I've seen lately .....

• The Fighting Sullivans .... Remembered the ending from viewing it 30-40 years ago but little else. 
• Dark Passage .... With Humphrey Bogart.
• The Keys of the Kingdom .... With Gregory Peck. I saw five minutes of it previously and knew I had to see the entire movie.
• Some Like It Hot
• The Horse Soldiers
• Bad Day At Black Rock .... Brooding and building. For the first half of the movie you know that something is about to explode but you're not sure what.

I'm especially fascinated with films made in the immediate years before I was born. Just seeing what things looked and felt like just before I arrived. Even if it's a movie set fifty or a hundred years in the past, you can still get a sense for the world you were about to enter.

I don't like how in June, it gets light at 5:00am. I like an extra hour or two of darkness in the morning. I don't care for the gentle hints that it's time to get up and get busy. I also don't like how the cough medicine seems to work in reverse. 

Musings On The NBA Draft

Watching the NBA draft the other night and for me, it just didn’t have the suspense that past drafts held. Probably because Portland didn't have a pick. One gets the feeling though that there really isn’t anyone beyond the top two picks who will make a real impact. And then one of the top two picks, they keep mentioning that he can’t shoot.

 

So the latest fad in basketball seems to be “wingspan.” As in he’s 6’9’ with a 7’3” wingspan. Then they list the weaknesses …. Poor defender, mediocre rebounder for his size, can’t shoot, etc. …. Seems like everyone has at least two weaknesses. But he’s got that incredible wingspan. Like it overrides the fact that a guy struggles with the jump shot. All my years of playing and watching and I’ve never noticed a difference between having and not having a great wingspan.

It’s like all these guys with “wingspan” were just born in the last twenty years. Like there was something in the water twenty years ago.  

 

Anyway, it’s got me wanting to measure my own wingspan. Who knows …. I’m only 6’1” but maybe I have the wingspan of an eight footer? I might still have “upside” at age 60.

And when the panel of experts describe each player, you get the impression that they just pre-record two or three different descriptions that cover all the players. Like there's no variety or difference between individual players of similar size. I guess that's what this AAU system gets you. A bunch of clones.  

Thoughts On A Career

4:30am at work. How many times have I been in this exact spot for the past forty years? Sitting at my desk playing drums with a ball point pen and pad of paper for Joseph Arthur’s song, “Chemical.” Sometimes wandering mindlessly both inside and outside.

I used to love this shift in my younger days when I engaged in recreational sports such as week night and weekend softball and basketball. And also working a second job on the side. Those days seem like eons ago and also like yesterday. Or maybe I just thought being awake at this insane hour was full of fun times and adventure. Sure do hate the hours now though. Things change with age. What the hell was going through my mind back then? Now I’d almost prefer eating bugs to working these hours.

I stumble around half awake and fully exhausted. Someone tells me that I look tired, which I vehemently deny but my denials are a thin façade. Why bother denials anyway. Either I look tired or somewhere opposite. Personally stumbling around the way I am, I wonder if I look drunk.

How many times have I been awake at this exact moment of the day, make that the night, over the past forty-plus years?

Did it ever enter my mind when I first signed on that this would turn out to be my life? The year 1975 then and it’s like I closed my eyes for just a moment and upon opening them it’s 2016.

I can see a thousand faces pass by while my eyes are closed, who once shared this experience but I’m the only one remaining in this place

I seem to recall reading somewhere that this type of lifestyle tends to shorten ones lifespan. I suppose that’s what one gets for lacking focus and the discipline to get down to business in their college years. Let me be an example to the youth of the world then. The poster boy of considering the opposite path. Of not doing like I do (or did).

But consider for a moment that many people never made it this far. I’ve never known real hunger. I’ve always had a warm place to call home. When I started out I used to wonder how I would survive year to year. Then one day I realized that it all worked out. I’m a mess but hey, I can still walk around. Plenty of people end up in wheelchairs before they reach this point.

Record Store Blues

It's funny ..... When spending time browsing the aisles at record stores and sneaking peeks at selections the other people have in their arms, I always feel like they have the best and most interesting finds. Like, why couldn't I have found that record? And the thing is, it's usually some obscure band that I've never heard of but the fact that someone else HAS apparently heard of them, makes it immensely interesting to me. Especially if there's a cool looking album cover. So it's in those moments that I feel envy and jealously. Like if they put that record down and turn their head for a moment, I might just feel the urge to swoop in and scoop it up .... "Oh that was yours you say?"

Latest Obsession

It's my objective to get so many movies recorded and saved that eventually I have no desire for cable tv service. The calculated financial savings is what drives this obsession. I have a preference for movies of varied genres made between 1940-1965. History and sports documentaries and musical programming are also included in the collection. Hopefully someone looking through my choices would think that I have taste for good older films with a few bad, B-movie, sci fi classics and serials included.

Sneezy and Grumpy

If I only had a nickel for each time I've sneezed today. Hell let's make it a dime. I deserve a little extra for the effort. It was one of those days where the pollen just takes over your world causing you to seek shelter from the gazing eyes of others. To go far out of your way to avoid potential human contact. Like a dark closet in a remote location. I just don't want to be seen in this condition. Nose running, eyes swollen, gasping for breath, a sense that your head is about to pop. And just when you feel like you've managed to get things under control, it starts all over again. And though I know there's a light at the end of the tunnel (mid-July), it's distant and faint at the moment.

I've gone all day trying to face it with dignity. Silent and strong. No complaining. But finally home, behind closed doors, I'm letting it all out!! Not that it's going to help lower tomorrows pollen count. Though I'm holding out hope for a torrential, end-of-the-world type downpour. A good extended rain always helps.